It's People.

Mood: Awake.
Music: "It's Natural to Be Afraid" - Explosions in the Sky

My birthday's coming up soon.
I'm kind of skeptical as to what I'm going to do about that day. I mean, it's kind of scary.
Getting older, I mean. Not so much the whole "death" thing about being older, just... responsibility. Commitment to things I've grown so accustomed to putting off. It's crazy scary.

School's going alright. It's been kind of easygoing lately. Lucky me.

Biology- TAKS Warm-ups.
Math - Probability. Crazy easy.
World History - AP Test scantron, etc. Been studying like crazy for the exam in a month. I'm afraid of it. Extremely.
Lunch - studying, retardation, etc.
Academic Decathlon - surprisingly, Scrabble was put off today. We had to take notes on the process of communication because Mrs. Hummel felt like she NEEDED to put grades into the book for us. Yeah, we even have a quiz tomorrow. It's kind of stupid, really, but whatever.
Oral Interp - studied, talked with Kelsey, stole some of Darren's blizzard, watched people behave naturally around others and envied them, etc.
Latin - watched a the third and last part of Masada (starring Peter O'Toole and some other famous people that I pretended to know all about), and learned about the passive indicative voice. Not too stimulating, but enough to keep me ready for the next period.
English - Mrs. Weber wasn't here today... it was very sad. Not really, though. Our substitute was pretty amazing. We had several worksheets dished out to us, but Zach, Maria, Chelsy, Travis and I formed a pretty little circle on the ground and attempted to be industrious. Zach can be charming when he wants to be... it's kind of sad how little he thinks of himself. I wonder if he realizes that he can have any girl he wants if he just tried. Obviously he doesn't, but... it's such an injustice. He talked music almost the entire time and I couldn't help but smile at almost everything he said. Poor guy.

How can someone so unique, so kind, and smart think so lowly of themselves?
It quietly pains me to hear him speak so negatively himself.
He's kind of my hero, now that I think about it.
A hero, I guess. I have a lot of heroes.
But, he's one of them.

Poor Zach.
Used to have the hugest crush on him, too; in eighth grade, I mean. Now I know him, and I like him more as a friend than I ever did as a crush back then.
Oysters, indie, and Christ. Such a sweet guy.

Sadly: such a sweet guy.
It's a pity that I can't tell him to snap out of it; I might come off as crushing (which would be unfaithful to Ian; I'll never be unfaithful to Ian) or clingy, and I'm already afraid that Josh thinks that. I have to sit back and let him quietly beat himself up in the most lighthearted ways. Argh.

Hoyaw. Josh and I have been getting together once a weekend within the past few weeks. Pretty cool guy, it turns out. He no longer intimidates me (like he and Tyler used to last year; it was very saddening).


By the way: Boston was beautiful. I loved it.